I’m on a quest to claim absolute victory on every front.

~Charlie Sheen



You know what I love so far about my day…? I’m feeling some sweet sweet, victory. In a world gone all kinds of seedy and greedy – right along with grimy, obscene and gritty.

I find myself loose at the lip. Often letting shit, rip. Sometimes, laughing about myself, knowing full well ALL about, myself. So, I start speaking some, freak. My keys strike hot while I leak. The words appear in blisters as I bleed them. I let those firestorms ignite – I let those days of junkie past heat my spirit. All those “once upon a times…” scene by scene, they fly through my mind. Than all my rhyme, and all my reasons why – every single reason I had to leave it.

And no one knows me anymore, I am SO cold… I have learnt that I walk down this road – alone. My strength grew in the moments of, “I can’t go on…” But, no matter how far gone I thought I was… behind all those dark nights came new dawns.

Than from every wound came scars, and every scar, left a story. Those wounds become a story of, I survived. My story of recovery. They were also my physical reminder – the story was over. I was a shit storm survivor.

And yes, I had to disconnect myself from what I thought, I truly wanted. But it was the path I chose to walk on, alone. Realizing my addiction was the only thing I was holding on to. It was the only one that told me I was okay.

My disease is relentless and it will play me, the greatest battle to me was not the physical one. The greatest battle was the psychological one… Always remembering, addiction is going to get my brain shook, my money took, and my name in the undertakers’ book.

But not today – today I’m feeling some, sweet sweet, victory. Today’s a good day… I didn’t put a needle in myself.



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3 thoughts on “THE GREATEST BATTLE

    • As always my friend I totally hear n can relate to ur every word.thankx for putting it out there in words from someone who has also survived. Sometimes people can never understand unless one’s been there. Fight the good fight my friends , we will overcome

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